On Wednesday morning, less than 24 hours after I published those words about worry, I peeked back into the bedroom from my office and began talking to H. And then stopped mid-sentence after realizing he was on the phone with our realtor.
It was early. I knew by his “Um, hm,” and “No, I understand,” that the reason for the call wasn’t good news.
The buyers changed their mind about purchasing our house for reasons that elude all of us.
Our realtor was up all night praying about how to tell us.
Propping myself up against pillows and headboard, I pull the duvet up to my waist and listen to the end of their conversation. I knew God was giving me a choice about my response to this unexpected, bad news in our journey.
I can assume that the good news we got on New Year’s Eve about our house selling was ultimately an act of meanness; a test in my faith I am certain to fail with emotion. Tears of sadness stream down my face.
Or I can trust Him and believe he works all things together for my good, even in the midst of disappointment. Even in the midst of what seemed like an obvious answer to prayerful intercession by many.
I chose the first and then changed my mind and picked the latter.
The biggest hurdle we face as followers of Jesus is resisting assumptions about the way God feels about us based on circumstances.
The ways of God cannot be figured out, explained or reasoned into some kind of Hallmark understanding. When I want explanation for pain or suffering, I discount the mystery. Finding resolution becomes about me, not the purposes of Jesus.
His love for us is not determined by or relative to the outcomes of circumstance.
Perhaps that is why He healed on the Sabbath, for the way it dispels any rumors. About the way of Jesus fitting into a tidy, neat, little box.
Jesus is Sabbath. Sometimes our labor — whether physical, spiritual or mental — is preparation for experiencing the miracle in that.
May we all know the beauty of the communion of saints encircled among us, holding each other up when knees become wobbly in hardship. Sturdy, steadfast and earnest, that is what you’ve been for me this week. And words cannot begin to communicate the depth of my gratitude.
Happy Sabbath Friends!
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